I am a father and I’m not ashamed or scared to express my love for my daughter!

I spent seven years volunteering with Barnardos here in Canberra and I spent many years understanding and studying psychology behind why people do things.

One thing I know out of all this, is that sexual violence and intimidation is not only a cultural thing but it is something that is in most cases factor of the environment in which we grew up in, the environment in which we felt comfortable in the environment in which the foundations were set.

To transform our culture I believe we need to start at the grassroots and that for me is the family unit. It is within this family unit and the people associated with it that set the foundations for the children that will eventually have complete control over their own destiny.

Make a positive change today and help transform our culture by educating our children that sexual violence, intimidation and domestic violence is not okay!

It is not the victims fault as they didn’t choose to be a victim, so let’s change the culture away from victim blaming and put a spotlight where it belongs, back onto the perpetrators.

Males or females it doesn’t matter. This is a problem for us, all of us!

It is up to us to change the culture around sexual violence and to make sure that people know it is not okay!

Too much emphasis on communication around some of these events is put onto the victim and I feel that this is totally inappropriate. Victims are victims, by the very nature of being a victim you are not responsible or should be blamed for the actions of others are caused you to be a victim.

Some of these perpetrators walked this planet with a delusional understanding that they are better than everyone because they can go along and intimidate and control others through physical and emotional abuse.

These people have issues, serious issues that need to be addressed and recognised before they create a victim.

Red is the colour of passion, passion that I believe is within all of us. The walls and halls of the home should not be splattered in red.

The men and women subjected to sexual violence and domestic violence should not see the colour red and less the intent is love.

Far too many homes around Australia subject to the never-ending cycle of sexual and domestic abuse. This cycle continues through generations and one that I am all too familiar with.

When a child sees a parent either subjecting someone to sexual or domestic violence that sends a very strong message to that child that that behaviour is accepted. It doesn’t matter if they are male or female, the message is the same.

Studies have shown that children in this environment will either be a perpetrator or a victim of this never-ending cycle. It is up to us to go along and break this cycle!!

As a community and a culture we need to send a very clear message that this behaviour is not okay while also understanding the history and the reasons behind this type of behaviour.

It is not something that has been generated overnight but something that has been learned over a lifetime.

No matter the history this behaviour is not okay and if you are a victim or a perpetrator there is help out there.

If you know someone in this situation as I’m sure many of you do, be there for them. Help them through this, and make sure they know there is help out there.